If you are seeking a serious list of vintage sports card hobby jargon, we have you covered here. There are dozens of hobby terms to learn if entering or re-entering the hobby. But this is not that!
Instead, enjoy this glossary of hobby terms and phrases we love to hate–along with some analysis and / or translation. The terms themselves are not necessarily ridiculous–but their use often is somewhat detached from reality.
100% Authentic: Is there any other kind?
Collector grade: Low grade.
Dead centered: Reasonably well centered.
Estate find: Storage unit find.
Fresh to the hobby: Bought yesterday and already flipping it.
Gradable: What isn’t?
Pack fresh: Sharp corners but way off center.
Pop 1, none higher: No one else thought to have this card graded.
Presents well: Looks ok from the front. Possibly missing the back.
Rare: Only 10 others just like it currently available on eBay.
See pics for condition: “I don’t know about cards. Please assess from the blurry photos provided.”
Undergraded: Accurately graded.
Undervalued: Accurately valued.
Well-loved: Total beater–just as likely hated as loved, really. I don’t know about you, but I didn’t choose my favorite cards for the bike spokes.
Wrinkle: Crease.
Do you have any other card listing pet peeves? Drop them in the comments and I’ll add them!
I think “over used/abused” would be a more appropriate qualifier than “ridiculous” for some of the terms you have included.
Part of the problem is you have many new to the hobby people selling cards and over or misusing what in many cases is appropriate descriptive language. They do so in an effort to inflate the perceived value of a card they are selling (a great example of this would be “perfectly centered” when the card is visibly not better than 60-40.
In reading your definitions it seems you meant this more as a tongue in cheek article. I found it amusing, but the idea behind it is rooted in some important truth
Definitely tongue in cheek–and agree, many of the descriptors are not ridiculous in and of themselves. But sometimes the application leaves a bit to be desired.
I sold real estate for 20 years, and it’s similar. “Charming” means “small” and “old-house charm” means outdated and small. “Up and coming area” means “high crime neighborhood” and “handyman special” means “money pit.” Anywhere there’s something used for sale, there’s a seller trying to overstate it.